Eulogy: Rev. W. A. Willcox, Jr.
October 20, 1921-July 7, 2009
St. Mark’s Episcopal Church
Little Rock, Arkansas
July 13, 2009
The first part of my tribute to Dad is excerpted from a requiem called “Love Perfected,” by Christopher L. Webber, a retired Episcopal priest living in Sharon, CT. My father read this as part of a eulogy he delivered for a dear friend in 1991. It is based on I Corinthians 15: 56-57 which says “The sting of death is sin, but thanks be to God who gives us the victory through Jesus Christ our Lord.” Here are some of Christopher Webber’s thoughts on this famous verse: ‘Why do we hurt when someone dies? St. Paul tells us exactly why towards the end of that long and marvelous passage from I Corinthians.’ ‘Christians are not supposed to fool themselves into thinking that death doesn’t hurt. Death does hurt. It always will. But for Christians, that isn’t the whole story. What we have done or left undone makes it hurt. What God has done in Jesus Christ, however, gives us victory over death.’
‘There is a dialogue toward the end of an old Ingmar Bergman movie, “Scenes from a Marriage,” that goes something like this…The wife is saying, “The trouble is, I’ve never been able to love anyone and no one has ever been able to love me.” Then the husband says, “ Well, I love you in my inept and sinful way and you love me in spite of your domineering, controlling fashion. We do not love each other perfectly, but that’s just the way we are.” ‘How true! Ingmar Bergman and Paul the Apostle have made the same diagnosis of our human situation. What we humans want and need is a love better than our human love. We have to turn to God to find that kind of love. Jesus has shown in the cross and resurrection, the love God wants us to have. And we believe that God’s love will complete and perfect all our failures on earth. God places the lives of those we love in His hands and we give thanks for the victory He has given us.’
My father finishes his friend’s eulogy in his typical, Biblical, and theological way of preaching: “The New Testament teaches us that our resurrection body will not only preserve and continue our individual personalities, but it will preserve the identity of our persons. The body is sown in weakness. It is raised in power. It is sown a natural body. It is raised a spiritual body. “We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed.” We, in the meantime, ask God today, to help us to trust Him to complete our love for Him and for each other to love one another through Him and through Him alone.”
I found this inspirational eulogy as I was straightening up Dad’s office. It was written on legal paper, aged brown from time. What a synchronistic and serendipitous discovery! I was contemplating a eulogy that would give me and my family and others who loved my Dad some solace. This comforts me. It was as if this eulogy became a part of Dad’s legacy to family and friends.”
Another incredible thing happened to me in preparation for today’s service: Before John and I left Little Rock to see Dad in Grace Home Hospice, I borrowed a hymnal from this church to decide which hymns I wanted to use for the funeral. For some reason, I turned to the inside hard cover, only to discover that the Hymnal had been dedicated to Mom and Dad by Mary Sue and John Jacobs. Mary Sue Horner Jacobs’ parents were among the first charter members of this church. Her family hosted a welcoming picnic in 1953 for my family and the congregation in their Scott, AR home. I actually remember it! The food was great; so were the people! That picnic was a suitable kick-off for Dad’s 20 years of ministry in this Holy place and in the Little Rock community. Now, after hundreds of the seven sacred sacraments that Dad celebrated here and at the three other churches that he helped launch, the thing that people remember and tell me is that Dad’s pastoral care was the most meaningful: that it will never be forgotten. His hospital visits, private Eucharist services, and prayers for the ill or shut-ins was one of Dad’special ministries. Even after retirement from serving as a rector, Dad volunteered for many years in Shreveport as the Convocational Priest for the hospitalized. He only gave that up when aging made it too tiring.
Now, he is gone. One very unanticipated way he can still be visited is on Google Earth, of all things! It captured him in his driveway when photographing 155 Kayla St., his home in Shreveport. He went out every morning to get the paper or pick up the magnolia leaves which constantly shed in the front yard. When he saw his image on his son John Mark’s laptop, he looked somewhat quizzically, but had no comment…not too impressed with modern technology. The best way he can be visited is right outside these doors. Thankfully, many years ago, Mom and Dad asked me to pick out two plots for them in the Columbarium. The two I chose are about the closest, looking over the wall, towards the Willcox Educational Building, named in Dad’s honor. I chose these plots so they would be resting close to the first church building. Furthermore, the very first church on Mississippi Avenue, on a narrow, dirt rutted road. They both liked the idea.
Now, we are all pastoring Bill when we will soon lay his ashes to rest, next to Mom. There couldn’t be a better place. May we pray that Bill rest in peace, as he makes his journey from this life into the next. Amen.
Tina Willcox Bodiak
